I will return.

Look at them
Walking steadily, starring focusedly into the horizon
Documents in their hands, well dressed, pens in their breast pockets for the males
And the ladies in their skirt suits
Swiftly they pass
They seem organized,
Like they know who they are,
Who they really are
like they know what they’re doing,
The right thing
Like they know where they’re headed,
Their destination
Like they know what awaits them,
Can they predict it?
But they sure seem to be preparing well for it.

And me?
What about me?
I feel like I’m lost in the middle of the street
Totally confused
I don’t  know what I’m doing
I don’t know  what direction I’m  headed
I don’t know what I want
I know nothing
They keep bumping into me
Asking me to watch where I’m   going, giving me funny stares
Is there something wrong with me?
With my face? My appearance?
Am I different?
Is it that obvious?

What am I even doing here?
Is this where I should be?
At this time?
Amongst all these people?
I don’t think I’m  equipped
I don’t think I’m  ready yet
I need to go
I should go somewhere quiet
Somewhere with less traffic
I need somewhere I can think  clearly
Where I can look deep inside of me
You know, to try figure myself out
I think I need the air to myself
Coz here, where I’m standing
It’s like I’m in the middle of the street, suffocating but no one can notice me
I’m screaming for help
It’s the loudest I can get
But no one seems to hear me
No one even bothers to turn
Am I invisible?

I’m not fleeing,
But I assure you I will return.


Author: laurahstar

Poetry.Deep musings.Just thoughts that might help one day

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